A couple of weeks ago, we had a Soul Winning Seminar in our church and one thing that the speaker emphasized is to know and be able to share your own testimony. So, I began to think about it, "Bill Gray, when and how did you become a Christian believer?" And, the answer is rather sad. I did not become a Christian believer until I was fifty years old.
As a young boy growing up in Alabama, which I have always smilingly referred to as the "Belt Buckle of the Bible Belt" - I had plenty of opportunities. So, why not? What prevented me from becoming a Christian believer? Well, there is not just one reason, but a chain of reasons:
1. First, there was a Pentecostal Revival Preacher who drove me away from God,
2. Then, I had a false understanding of hell - mixed with a desire for the secular world,
3. None of the churches I attended during those young years - ever mentioned or invited me to a Bible study,
4. My lack of knowledge of God's Word and His love for me, kept me in the world.
I suppose all of those combined is why I was not a Christian believer until I was fifty years old. My wife, Dory, was a Christian when we married, and many times I have told her that the biggest mistake she ever made was to marry me, a non-believer. Yet, in a sense, I was a believer - and not a believer. All my life I have believed that God and Jesus Christ are real. But, I always kept them at a distance, never really allowing them into my life.
So, let's look at those four reasons:
1. A Pentecostal Revival Preacher who drove me away from God:
When my brother, Bob, and I were young boys my mother wanted us to attend church. Because of her lack of education she was not comfortable attending herself, but she wanted her boys in church. So, she sent us to the nearest one, a Nazarene church two blocks from home. We would go there for Sunday School, then take off. When I was twelve years old, my mom and step-dad were attending a Wednesday Night Revival Meeting at that Nazarene church and she begged me to go with her.
During the Revival Meeting, the traveling Revival Preacher told everyone to stand. Then he said, "All who have been saved sit down." I may have been only twelve, but I was not going to lie about it - so I remained standing. Then he said, "Just keep standing until you come to the altar to be saved." My Friends, if I had been an adult at that time - I would have just walked out. But as a young boy, I could not. So, my only choice was to go forward and "be saved"- whatever that meant.
When I went forward the Preacher and his associates begin to shout "Hallelujahs" and "Praise the Lords" over me, while getting all worked into a feeding frenzy - and I will admit that I got caught up in the emotions of the moment. What happened? Well this young twelve year old boy went home believing he had been save - but still with no idea what that meant. But with all that Hallelujahs and Praise the Lords - I must be saved - and it had to be very special, didn't it? I didn't know.
What happened next? Well, that night laying in bed - my twelve year old male mind began to have thoughts about some of my female classmates. Whoa! How could that happen? That Revival Preacher just told me I was saved, that I belonged to Jesus Christ - and here I was having carnal, very fleshly thoughts about girls. Something must be really be wrong with me! And, so, my self-image went down the toilet.
Because of that incident and the negative affect it had upon my life - to this day I cannot call anyone I respect "Preacher" - and I ran from God until I was fifty years old.
2. A false understanding of hell - mixed with a desire for the secular world:
There was never a time in my life that I can remember when I did not believe that God and Jesus Christ are real. But, how could a guy like me who loved girls and loved to party, a guy who supposedly had been saved - and then immediately jumped right back into sin - how could that guy have a relationship with God?
I could feel the Holy Spirit tugging at my heart, but I did not know how to respond. Once when I was in the Air Force, I was in the hospital for a short period. In the hospital a friend and I started reading the New Testament. We decided that it would be good if we got baptized, so we went to the hospital chaplain, who was Methodist.
When we told him we wanted to be baptized, he did not ask us a single question, i.e., Do you understand the meaning of baptism? Do you understand what it means to be saved? Are you currently attending worship services? Do you believe in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior? Not one single question. Just, "Okay, come into my office" where he sprinkled water on our heads, told us to have a good day, and showed us out. Who knows, maybe he was late for a golf date. But, that was it - sprinkle, sprinkle, and have a good day!
Because I did know that God was real, in my teen years and young adult years I visited a lot of churches ~ Baptist, Methodist, Nazarene, Roman Catholic, Lutheran, Episcopalian, Presbyterian, etc., you name it, I tried it ~ searching. Searching for what? Well, because I was so much into the world, I was searching for a church that would tell me that hell is not real.
Yes, I was in that stage of my life when I wanted my worldly secular fun - and yet sensed that I needed God, also. But, at that time of my life, having to choose between the two, I chose the world. Lo and behold, I did find a Chaplain in the Air Force from a large Protestant denomination (later I learned that it was a liberal denomination which has today accepted gay and women pastors - and performs same-sex marriages) who told me that hell is not real, hell is only a myth.
Wow! Praise God! Now I could party all week and go to church on Sundays (well, at least some Sundays, when not hung over) - and not have to worry about going to hell. That really did sound great! But, the problem is - that Chaplain was very wrong. Hell is very real - but God has given us an escape clause, we can escape hell by having a saving relationship with His Son, Jesus Christ.
3. None of the churches I attended during those young years - ever mentioned or invited me to a Bible study:
In 1987, for the first time I attended the Fil-Am Church of Irvine (CA), where Pastor Sam Lacanienta was pastor. That Friday Dory asked if I wanted to go to Bible study. I had to ask her what that was - for until I was fifty years old - no church I had ever attended had Bible studies.
Or if they did, they kept it a close secret - for I had never heard of a Bible study until that day when Dory asked if I wanted to attend one. Since I had experienced such love at their Sunday worship service, I was eager to see what they did at a Bible study - and I was not disappointed. That same love was there among the fellowship - and that love kept me coming back until, after six months, I became a believer.
But, why had no church ever told me about Family Home Bible Studies before? Did the not have them? Or did they think that those Bible studies should be for their members only? Whatever the reason - they were so wrong. Family Home Bible studies are the best way for the whole family to learn about God's Word, and grow in it, together.
In the thirty years I have been a Christian believer I have always been in a churches which were Bible-teaching, Christ-centered fellowships. And, if I came to a new fellowship which did not have a Bible study, I would insist that we start a Family Home Bible Study.
Why? Because it was the six months I spent in Bible study at the Fil-Am Church of Irvine (CA) which the Holy Spirit used to bring me into a relationship with Jesus Christ. Yes, I enjoyed the Sunday Sermons - but it was sitting with believers in a Bible study and actively discussing God's Word with them - which helped me become a believer.
Yet, in all the churches I attended over the years between that disastrous Revival Preacher episode when I was twelve - and finding the right Christian fellowship at age fifty - NONE of them ever mentioned Bible study or ever invited me to one.
I still believe Dory was wrong for marrying me, a non-believer. But, praise God, He took this old sow's ear and made a silk purse! He made a Christian believer out of me. It took Dory ten years of praying for me - but eventually God led us to a pastor, Sam Lacanienta, and to a church, Fil-Am Church of Irvine (CA), which was so full of love that I wanted to attend. After attending their worship services, Sunday School classes, and Bible studies for six month - I became a believer.
I was a non-believer saved in a Family Home Bible Study. But, I do have to admit that I have often wondered over the years - why do we have so few visitors in our Bible studies? Many folks who are hesitant about attending "Sunday Worship Service" very likely would be more inclined to attend a Bible study in a friend's home. I have seen many wonderful things happen at Family Home Bible Studies. But, let me just mention one.
Circa 2000, a mother and her two young boys were attending our weekly Bible studies but not our worship services because the father was a "I was born a Roman Catholic and I will die a Roman Catholic" kind of Roman Catholic. Yet, every Friday evening the mother and two boys were faithfully attending our Bible studies.
One evening our pastor did something a bit different - he gave an altar call at our Bible study. And, as I recall, six or eight people stood to receive Christ as Lord and Savior. Three of them were the mother and her two young sons. The next week the dad came and received the Lord. He later told me that he came because his two young sons came home from Bible study and began to witness to him. That family is a strong Christian family today. Those two young boys are now young adults - and the oldest is in seminary while serving as an associate pastor at one of our local churches. That is the power of a Family Home Bible Study.
By the way, the Fil-Am Church of Corona where they were saved in a Bible study - was not having Bible study when Dory and I came to Riverside County in 1998. I told our pastor that our church had to have a Family Home Bible Study and offered to start one in our apartment home. For about three months it was only the pastor's wife and two young boys, a Christian sister, Myra, and Dory and me. And, when his schedule allowed, the pastor would attend.
After about three months our Bible study outgrew our apartment home and had to be moved into a larger home. After that, we began to rotate between homes. It was at a Family Home Bible Study at our pastor's home that he gave that momentous, life changing altar call - which changed a loving family, into a loving Christian family.
4. My lack of knowledge of God's Word and His love for me kept me in the world:
I suppose that, in 1987 when I discovered the Fil-Am Church of Irvine, I was like the person Pastor Greg Laurie (Harvest Crusades) was thinking of when he said, "I would rather a person come into our church, sit in the back, listen to and think about the messages from the Bible for six months ~ and then come forward to receive Jesus Christ - rather than hearing the message once and coming forward on emotion instead of true understanding."
When I went forward at age twelve, it was for two reasons: Fear of the Revival Preacher's spiritual wrath - and emotion. Both wrong reasons and both self-defeating.
Pastor Greg was alluding to the fact that he and Billy Graham do not call a person who comes forward at a Crusade a believer, a convert. Instead they call that person an "inquirer" - a person who may be beginning to seek the Lord. At the Crusades they counsel each Inquirer and try to connect him/her with a local church fellowship. Too often, folks come forward on emotion only, or because the person they rode with went forward - and the next week, they are back in sync with the world and the secular society.
Billy Graham has always said that when that person who came forward has been connected with and involved in a local church fellowship, in worship service, Sunday School, and Bible study - for a year or so, and come to truly understand why he/she came forward at the altar call - then that person can be called a convert, a Christian believer.
That works for me, for that is basically what I did. I attended church, Sunday School, and weekly Bible study for six months at the Fil-Am Church of Irvine (FACI) - and then realized that I truly did believe and wanted to be a Christ Follower.
My Friends, please forgive me for getting carried away and rambling on. But, my faith is my passion. And it truly is important to me that folks understand that we do not have to be perfect to come to saving faith in Jesus Christ. For, one day I want to meet and fellowship with YOU and your family in heaven.
Nothing is more important than sharing God's Word, the Gospel of Jesus Christ, with those who do not yet believe. Imagine one day when you are in heaven and another saint approaches you and tells you, "Thank you for telling me about Jesus Christ." Can there be a greater blessing than that?
I will close with a story I read some years ago and to the best of my knowledge, it is a true story. A pastor was visiting patients in a hospital when a lady approached him and said, "Thank you for leading me to the Lord."
The pastor was embarrassed and told the lady, "I am sorry, but I do not remember you."
She smiled and said, "We never met. But several years ago you were visiting your mother in the hospital and I was a patient on the other side of the privacy curtain. As you read the Bible, shared with your mom, and prayed with her - I could hear you. That day, as you prayed with your mom, I prayed to ask Jesus Christ to come into my heart and be my Lord and Savior. That may never have happened if I had not been in that patient bed, behind the privacy curtain, and heard your words and your prayers that day. Thank you."
We never know which words, which actions, or which prayers we share will be the one which brings another soul to Jesus Christ. So, keep sharing!
Okay, I am fudging. There is one more short story I want to share about being a witness for the Lord. In her book "Out Of The Salt Shaker & Into The World" Rebecca Manley Pippert wrote about her friendship with an atheist lady, Stephanie, who had become a believer. After Stephanie became a believer, she made this confession to Becky Pippert (page 29):
Can you use your testimony, your strengths AND your weaknesses - to be His witness to non-believers? Think about it!
God bless, have a wonderful, blessed day,
Bill
As a young boy growing up in Alabama, which I have always smilingly referred to as the "Belt Buckle of the Bible Belt" - I had plenty of opportunities. So, why not? What prevented me from becoming a Christian believer? Well, there is not just one reason, but a chain of reasons:
1. First, there was a Pentecostal Revival Preacher who drove me away from God,
2. Then, I had a false understanding of hell - mixed with a desire for the secular world,
3. None of the churches I attended during those young years - ever mentioned or invited me to a Bible study,
4. My lack of knowledge of God's Word and His love for me, kept me in the world.
I suppose all of those combined is why I was not a Christian believer until I was fifty years old. My wife, Dory, was a Christian when we married, and many times I have told her that the biggest mistake she ever made was to marry me, a non-believer. Yet, in a sense, I was a believer - and not a believer. All my life I have believed that God and Jesus Christ are real. But, I always kept them at a distance, never really allowing them into my life.
So, let's look at those four reasons:
1. A Pentecostal Revival Preacher who drove me away from God:
When my brother, Bob, and I were young boys my mother wanted us to attend church. Because of her lack of education she was not comfortable attending herself, but she wanted her boys in church. So, she sent us to the nearest one, a Nazarene church two blocks from home. We would go there for Sunday School, then take off. When I was twelve years old, my mom and step-dad were attending a Wednesday Night Revival Meeting at that Nazarene church and she begged me to go with her.
During the Revival Meeting, the traveling Revival Preacher told everyone to stand. Then he said, "All who have been saved sit down." I may have been only twelve, but I was not going to lie about it - so I remained standing. Then he said, "Just keep standing until you come to the altar to be saved." My Friends, if I had been an adult at that time - I would have just walked out. But as a young boy, I could not. So, my only choice was to go forward and "be saved"- whatever that meant.
When I went forward the Preacher and his associates begin to shout "Hallelujahs" and "Praise the Lords" over me, while getting all worked into a feeding frenzy - and I will admit that I got caught up in the emotions of the moment. What happened? Well this young twelve year old boy went home believing he had been save - but still with no idea what that meant. But with all that Hallelujahs and Praise the Lords - I must be saved - and it had to be very special, didn't it? I didn't know.
What happened next? Well, that night laying in bed - my twelve year old male mind began to have thoughts about some of my female classmates. Whoa! How could that happen? That Revival Preacher just told me I was saved, that I belonged to Jesus Christ - and here I was having carnal, very fleshly thoughts about girls. Something must be really be wrong with me! And, so, my self-image went down the toilet.
Because of that incident and the negative affect it had upon my life - to this day I cannot call anyone I respect "Preacher" - and I ran from God until I was fifty years old.
2. A false understanding of hell - mixed with a desire for the secular world:
There was never a time in my life that I can remember when I did not believe that God and Jesus Christ are real. But, how could a guy like me who loved girls and loved to party, a guy who supposedly had been saved - and then immediately jumped right back into sin - how could that guy have a relationship with God?
I could feel the Holy Spirit tugging at my heart, but I did not know how to respond. Once when I was in the Air Force, I was in the hospital for a short period. In the hospital a friend and I started reading the New Testament. We decided that it would be good if we got baptized, so we went to the hospital chaplain, who was Methodist.
When we told him we wanted to be baptized, he did not ask us a single question, i.e., Do you understand the meaning of baptism? Do you understand what it means to be saved? Are you currently attending worship services? Do you believe in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior? Not one single question. Just, "Okay, come into my office" where he sprinkled water on our heads, told us to have a good day, and showed us out. Who knows, maybe he was late for a golf date. But, that was it - sprinkle, sprinkle, and have a good day!
Because I did know that God was real, in my teen years and young adult years I visited a lot of churches ~ Baptist, Methodist, Nazarene, Roman Catholic, Lutheran, Episcopalian, Presbyterian, etc., you name it, I tried it ~ searching. Searching for what? Well, because I was so much into the world, I was searching for a church that would tell me that hell is not real.
Yes, I was in that stage of my life when I wanted my worldly secular fun - and yet sensed that I needed God, also. But, at that time of my life, having to choose between the two, I chose the world. Lo and behold, I did find a Chaplain in the Air Force from a large Protestant denomination (later I learned that it was a liberal denomination which has today accepted gay and women pastors - and performs same-sex marriages) who told me that hell is not real, hell is only a myth.
Wow! Praise God! Now I could party all week and go to church on Sundays (well, at least some Sundays, when not hung over) - and not have to worry about going to hell. That really did sound great! But, the problem is - that Chaplain was very wrong. Hell is very real - but God has given us an escape clause, we can escape hell by having a saving relationship with His Son, Jesus Christ.
3. None of the churches I attended during those young years - ever mentioned or invited me to a Bible study:
In 1987, for the first time I attended the Fil-Am Church of Irvine (CA), where Pastor Sam Lacanienta was pastor. That Friday Dory asked if I wanted to go to Bible study. I had to ask her what that was - for until I was fifty years old - no church I had ever attended had Bible studies.
Or if they did, they kept it a close secret - for I had never heard of a Bible study until that day when Dory asked if I wanted to attend one. Since I had experienced such love at their Sunday worship service, I was eager to see what they did at a Bible study - and I was not disappointed. That same love was there among the fellowship - and that love kept me coming back until, after six months, I became a believer.
But, why had no church ever told me about Family Home Bible Studies before? Did the not have them? Or did they think that those Bible studies should be for their members only? Whatever the reason - they were so wrong. Family Home Bible studies are the best way for the whole family to learn about God's Word, and grow in it, together.
In the thirty years I have been a Christian believer I have always been in a churches which were Bible-teaching, Christ-centered fellowships. And, if I came to a new fellowship which did not have a Bible study, I would insist that we start a Family Home Bible Study.
Why? Because it was the six months I spent in Bible study at the Fil-Am Church of Irvine (CA) which the Holy Spirit used to bring me into a relationship with Jesus Christ. Yes, I enjoyed the Sunday Sermons - but it was sitting with believers in a Bible study and actively discussing God's Word with them - which helped me become a believer.
Yet, in all the churches I attended over the years between that disastrous Revival Preacher episode when I was twelve - and finding the right Christian fellowship at age fifty - NONE of them ever mentioned Bible study or ever invited me to one.
I still believe Dory was wrong for marrying me, a non-believer. But, praise God, He took this old sow's ear and made a silk purse! He made a Christian believer out of me. It took Dory ten years of praying for me - but eventually God led us to a pastor, Sam Lacanienta, and to a church, Fil-Am Church of Irvine (CA), which was so full of love that I wanted to attend. After attending their worship services, Sunday School classes, and Bible studies for six month - I became a believer.
I was a non-believer saved in a Family Home Bible Study. But, I do have to admit that I have often wondered over the years - why do we have so few visitors in our Bible studies? Many folks who are hesitant about attending "Sunday Worship Service" very likely would be more inclined to attend a Bible study in a friend's home. I have seen many wonderful things happen at Family Home Bible Studies. But, let me just mention one.
Circa 2000, a mother and her two young boys were attending our weekly Bible studies but not our worship services because the father was a "I was born a Roman Catholic and I will die a Roman Catholic" kind of Roman Catholic. Yet, every Friday evening the mother and two boys were faithfully attending our Bible studies.
One evening our pastor did something a bit different - he gave an altar call at our Bible study. And, as I recall, six or eight people stood to receive Christ as Lord and Savior. Three of them were the mother and her two young sons. The next week the dad came and received the Lord. He later told me that he came because his two young sons came home from Bible study and began to witness to him. That family is a strong Christian family today. Those two young boys are now young adults - and the oldest is in seminary while serving as an associate pastor at one of our local churches. That is the power of a Family Home Bible Study.
By the way, the Fil-Am Church of Corona where they were saved in a Bible study - was not having Bible study when Dory and I came to Riverside County in 1998. I told our pastor that our church had to have a Family Home Bible Study and offered to start one in our apartment home. For about three months it was only the pastor's wife and two young boys, a Christian sister, Myra, and Dory and me. And, when his schedule allowed, the pastor would attend.
After about three months our Bible study outgrew our apartment home and had to be moved into a larger home. After that, we began to rotate between homes. It was at a Family Home Bible Study at our pastor's home that he gave that momentous, life changing altar call - which changed a loving family, into a loving Christian family.
4. My lack of knowledge of God's Word and His love for me kept me in the world:
I suppose that, in 1987 when I discovered the Fil-Am Church of Irvine, I was like the person Pastor Greg Laurie (Harvest Crusades) was thinking of when he said, "I would rather a person come into our church, sit in the back, listen to and think about the messages from the Bible for six months ~ and then come forward to receive Jesus Christ - rather than hearing the message once and coming forward on emotion instead of true understanding."
When I went forward at age twelve, it was for two reasons: Fear of the Revival Preacher's spiritual wrath - and emotion. Both wrong reasons and both self-defeating.
Pastor Greg was alluding to the fact that he and Billy Graham do not call a person who comes forward at a Crusade a believer, a convert. Instead they call that person an "inquirer" - a person who may be beginning to seek the Lord. At the Crusades they counsel each Inquirer and try to connect him/her with a local church fellowship. Too often, folks come forward on emotion only, or because the person they rode with went forward - and the next week, they are back in sync with the world and the secular society.
Billy Graham has always said that when that person who came forward has been connected with and involved in a local church fellowship, in worship service, Sunday School, and Bible study - for a year or so, and come to truly understand why he/she came forward at the altar call - then that person can be called a convert, a Christian believer.
That works for me, for that is basically what I did. I attended church, Sunday School, and weekly Bible study for six months at the Fil-Am Church of Irvine (FACI) - and then realized that I truly did believe and wanted to be a Christ Follower.
My Friends, please forgive me for getting carried away and rambling on. But, my faith is my passion. And it truly is important to me that folks understand that we do not have to be perfect to come to saving faith in Jesus Christ. For, one day I want to meet and fellowship with YOU and your family in heaven.
Nothing is more important than sharing God's Word, the Gospel of Jesus Christ, with those who do not yet believe. Imagine one day when you are in heaven and another saint approaches you and tells you, "Thank you for telling me about Jesus Christ." Can there be a greater blessing than that?
I will close with a story I read some years ago and to the best of my knowledge, it is a true story. A pastor was visiting patients in a hospital when a lady approached him and said, "Thank you for leading me to the Lord."
The pastor was embarrassed and told the lady, "I am sorry, but I do not remember you."
She smiled and said, "We never met. But several years ago you were visiting your mother in the hospital and I was a patient on the other side of the privacy curtain. As you read the Bible, shared with your mom, and prayed with her - I could hear you. That day, as you prayed with your mom, I prayed to ask Jesus Christ to come into my heart and be my Lord and Savior. That may never have happened if I had not been in that patient bed, behind the privacy curtain, and heard your words and your prayers that day. Thank you."
We never know which words, which actions, or which prayers we share will be the one which brings another soul to Jesus Christ. So, keep sharing!
Okay, I am fudging. There is one more short story I want to share about being a witness for the Lord. In her book "Out Of The Salt Shaker & Into The World" Rebecca Manley Pippert wrote about her friendship with an atheist lady, Stephanie, who had become a believer. After Stephanie became a believer, she made this confession to Becky Pippert (page 29):
“At first I thought, fine, let Becky have her religion – that’s her bag. I’m not the least bit interested, but if that’s her thing then it’s all right with me. Then you invited me to dinner and before you ate you asked if we could thank God for the food. I thought, ‘Oh, how quaint.’
Only you didn’t just thank Him for the food - you thanked Him for me and our friendship! It made me feel good inside. I never thought you felt our relationship had anything to do with God. But then I thought, ‘That’s ridiculous - thanking someone who doesn’t exist for me.’
“Another day you invited me to an objective, no-strings-attached study of the person of Jesus in the Bible. Fine. Only trouble was - I really liked the guy! He seemed so real as we would read about Him each week.
“But you know what affected me the most? All my life I used to think, ‘How arrogant for someone to call himself a Christian, to think he’s that good’ But then I got to know you - and Becky, you are far from perfect, yet you call yourself a Christian. So my first shock was to discover you ‘blow it’ like I do.
But the biggest shock was that you admitted it, where I couldn’t. Suddenly I saw that being a Christian didn’t mean never failing, but admitting when you’ve failed. I wanted to keep Christ in a box and let you be religious during Bible studies. But the more you let me inside your life, the more impossible it became to keep the lid on Christianity. Even your admission of weaknesses drove me to Him!"
Can you use your testimony, your strengths AND your weaknesses - to be His witness to non-believers? Think about it!
God bless, have a wonderful, blessed day,
Bill
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